We want to spend time with them, and then we want to have some
type of communication with them.
Most of these feelings can be attributed to the own
perception of what we would like them to be.
We get with others based on what we find to be a compliment
with our own lives. Because we have the tendency to allow our imaginations to
go wild, all this can be very tricky. What seems even trickier is the fact that
we are enjoying the warm fuzzy feelings that are stirring in us when we allow
ourselves to create these fantasies.
I personally have had these warm fuzzy feelings towards
another twice in my life, and neither person I had taken to the next level of marraige. I
was able to put aside the chemistry and attraction and see things long term. That’s
very difficult to do especially when there is chemistry in the bedroom, and the
attraction is high. By putting aside
deep felt compassion, I was able to see flaws I couldn’t live with long term. Knowing this I walked away from the relationship
in order to be the bigger person. It is important to keep in mind that the other
person is only showing us the parts of himself or herself that they want us to
see.
Everyone is out to make a good impression. After all, do we not want to be liked? We may choose to tell the other person everything we think
they want to hear in order to impress them. Whether there is any truth to what
we say does not seem to be important in the early stages of a relationship.
In other words it is not really our intention to deceive; it
is just that we allow ourselves to become so infatuated with this person that
we portray ourselves as very agreeable individuals.
I do believe it takes some living adult years before acquiring
mature skills to last a lifetime in a relationship. Our life experiences aren’t
enough once we graduated from college. We need to live responsible lives on our
own and experience different walks of life before deciding on a partner.
I’ve been in long term relationships but none have convinced
me to have children. That too takes discipline to decide. Just because one is
in a relationship doesn’t mean we have to have children together. Just because
a person makes a good partner in one area doesn’t mean they make a good partner
in all areas. This world isn’t going to have a shortage of
people. So before settling down and having children with a person, remember
there are one too many children going through a divorce. No we can’t predict
the future; however, we all have an inner voice talking to us. Someday it is
going to scream at you telling you to wake up,by then make certain you haven’t involved
a whole family. Make certain your not being trapped into having children.
Awareness is something that begins from within each of us.
It then moves outward into the world that surrounds us. It is for this reason
that we must develop an understanding of just who we are before we can
understand how we relate to another.
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